Saturday, September 25, 2010

The Joke's On Me or The Long Con

Hello Internet! Remember back in April when I said I thought the universe might be trying to pull a long con on me? Well, for those of you not already in on the joke, I was right. Just a few days after the S.O. and I had a conversation about how it's probably all for the best for us to not have a baby, I find out that I just might be after all.

That's right Internet, I am pregnant, in the family way, knocked up, preggers, expecting, have a bun in the oven. And no, we didn't plan it to happen this way. It just did. In fact, the so-called fertility specialists told us we had about a 1 percent chance of getting pregnant "the natural way." (Those specialists can kiss my ass, by the way).

It's all quite scary and exciting at the same time, like a really good zombie movie or a roller coaster. In fact, it's almost exactly like those things, I'm scared, but having a good time and completely nauseous most of the time.

Don't try to tell me all the things that can go wrong. And I don't want to hear anyone's horror stories. I've heard enough of them anyway -- from the scary one-in-a-million birth defects they feature on TLC to the former co-worker who told my pregnant friend that the air in Colorado could cause a miscarriage (sorry, I have to breathe!) to all the things that can happen to my body during and after pregnancy. At this point, I kind of figure the universe will have it's joke and I will have a baby at 43. Hey, if the celebrities can do it, I can do it.

With all that said, I promise to try to not talk about it all the time. But once the baby is born, expect plenty of photos and stories about the adorable (and maddening) things that happen around our house.

Here's the first of the photos. Although I'm pretty sure that's a panda.